Hello, Lyme Disease

Tick

“I had heard of You by the hearing of the ear,
but now my eye sees You.”
Job 42:5 ESV

I apologize for staying away for so long.  I’m finally ready to share what has been going on in my life. (This article was first written in January … I’ve “sat” on it for awhile and finally felt like editing and publishing it today. Hopefully this is clear, despite my ever-present brain fog. Please feel free to ask questions.)  Last autumn things were going well, and I was just getting back into the swing of things with life and with my new blog.  And I was getting better, or so I thought.

In October I was very surprised to find out I have Lyme disease.  Other than continuing fatigue and a few other niggling problems like a stiff neck, headaches, brain fog, insomnia, stiffness, occasional dizziness, sensitivities to foods/chemicals/mold, and various body pains, my overall health and blood work had improved after months of following a strict allergy elimination diet.  It is by God’s grace that I went ahead and did the Lyme blood *test, “just in case.”

When I was told, “You have Lyme disease,” everything seemed to stop for awhile.  I had heard of Lyme disease but didn’t know much about it.  My mother-in-grace had suggested several weeks earlier that I might have it, but when I looked up the symptoms, I didn’t think I qualified for that diagnosis.  And I didn’t understand how this could happen when I didn’t remember getting a tick bite or bulls eye rash.  (I’ve since found out you can also get Lyme through a mosquito bite.)  When I looked online, I must’ve found all the worse case scenarios: blindness, trouble breathing, terrible pain, devastating herxing reactions, losing use of limbs, brain damage, etc.  (These drastic symptoms are usually experienced by people who go undiagnosed for years, even decades.  If they get treatment, they usually improve and can become functioning again.) I allowed myself to be gripped by fear.  In my mind I KNOW God is in control and can be trusted.  But, at that point, I was freaking out.

Based on a misunderstanding, I began to use essential oils too much too fast.  Instead of diffusing these powerful agents fifteen minutes at a time, I was running it for hours on end.  I began to have trouble breathing and felt like a moose was sitting on my chest.  My fear escalated.  I read and tried everything I could think of to get better:  I prayed, meditated on Scripture, rested, tried to divert my mind by watching Tim Hawkins, tried to ignore it and “go on with life,” bounced on the trampoline (for a full 9 seconds until I knew that wasn’t helping), etc.  Panic was my companion (*** See below for helpful resources).  I called my doctor to make an appointment, but hearing of my chest pains they refused to see me and sent me directly to the ER.  Sigh.  I thank God for the friends who helped with our boys.  Had God forsaken us?  NO.

Honestly, I didn’t know if I was going to live or die.  I. Felt. Terrible.  I was at a point of total abandonment of my plans and complete humbling to God’s will, whatever that included.  And, I was exactly where God wanted me.

As my husband and I waited for tests to be run and reports to come back, I glanced up at the clock.  It was a detailed digital clock that looked something like this:

digital clock

What I saw took my breath away.  11:11 and 11 seconds.  Relief swept over me and I called to my husband:  “Tim!  God cares about us!  God is with us!  Look at the clock!”  Knowing my secret code with God, Tim looked at me and simply said, “And today is November 11th … 11/11.”  It changed everything.  God didn’t have to be so extremely personal in His affirmation of love for me, but He WAS and IS personal!!! God gave me a beautiful gift that day that I will always treasure in my heart.  (You will understand why this was so special to us by reading here.)

The excellent hospital staff didn’t find anything life threatening and sent me home.  I can’t sufficiently express our thanks to my in-laws for coming to help us for a few days.  I was in a waiting and uncertainty mode.  My doctor who read my Lyme test results and gave me the diagnosis doesn’t know much about Lyme, so she referred me to two Lyme experts.

Finally, the days of my appointments arrived.  To sum it all up, both doctors looked at my test results and said I probably haven’t had Lyme very long.  This is a good thing as it probably means the infections haven’t embedded themselves as deeply.  The medical doc wanted to start me on antibiotics right away, but I’ve not had good experiences with antibiotics over the years and wanted the natural treatment doctor’s opinion before making a decision.  These two women work hand in hand, and I felt so blessed that God had led us to them through a dear friend named Ella.

Several days later we met with the natural doctor, who also has Lyme herself.  She assured me that I didn’t need antibiotics and started me on a natural protocol that has proven very effective for many people.  There is no cure for Lyme, but it can be manageable with vigilant care (more about this below).

For those who are interested, this is what I am taking:

1.  Monolaurin and Bio-Fibrin – This was recommended both by my medical doctor and natural practitioner.  It has a high success rate as it powerfully thins bio-films to you can actually get at the bacteria.  The coconut extract breaks through the bacteria cell walls killing them.  They also have a product that helps with detoxing the die-off.  You can read about the protocol here.
2.  Takuna – You can find out more about these powerful anti-microbial drops here.
(update as of 2/18/15 – I’m finished with Takuna and am now taking Futureplex Bacterotox drops)
3.  Resveratrol – This actually tastes yummy!
4.  Detox – Epsom salt baths, foot soaks, and infrared sauna
5.  Supplements – Vitamin D, B, milk thistle (liver, gall bladder), curcumin (turmeric), adrenal support, glutathione, magnesium.
6. To help with Adrenal Fatigue, I am following Dr. Christianson’s Adrenal Reset Diet protocol.  (Special thanks to my neighbor Jane for lending me her sun lamp!)
7. For herxing I have some homeopathic drops that greatly help, as well as sarsaparilla root capsules.

I’ve worked my way up to full dose.  One Sunday recently I was able to play the piano again for the entire church service for the first time in months (in October I couldn’t even stand for the singing and last summer I could barely play because of my arthritic fingers).  It is a joy that I don’t take for granted.  Yet, another Sunday I was so exhausted after playing I had to go lie down during the sermon.  I never know if it’s going to be a “good” day or a “bad” day.  Most days my worst symptoms are fatigue and brain fog.  A couple of times I have been laid flat by herxing (a negative physical response when you cannot get rid of the dying infection fast enough).  Depression lurks around the corner, especially if I indulge in sugar or chocolate.  It is difficult for me to drive in the dark, and I can’t multitask like I used to.  It is overwhelming to be around a lot of noise and flashing light.  Talking with people is exhausting even though I need and love the fellowship.

On Monday I felt the best I’ve felt in I don’t know how long.  Praise the Lord!  Then the past two days I’ve been dragging again.  Praise the Lord!  We need to praise Him in all things.  Sometimes this is a sacrifice of praise – and oh how He treasures it!!

Here are a few of the blessings:

  • the love and prayers of family and friends
  • watching God lovingly provide for our needs (including wisdom)
  • the only natural treatment expert in our state is ten minutes from my in-laws’ home
  • being able to add back in many foods
  • having a diagnosis and being able to work toward better health
  • becoming aware for the first time how widespread chronic pain is
  • increased compassion (our boys are learning this, too)
  • the opportunity to learn more about the complexity of the human body God created
  • receiving good medical treatment
  • complete surrender and rededication to God
  • the development of closer and stronger family bonds
  • not taking health for granted and appreciating the simple things in life
  • repenting of a complaining heart and learning contentment
  • being a living testimony of God’s faithful care
  • meeting people I probably never would have met otherwise
  • learning to be still and how to relax
  • discovering that my value doesn’t depend on what I can do for God, and that He can use me at my very weakest more than He could use me if I were doing 101 things for Him in my own strength
  • being forced to prioritize and humbling myself to ask for help
  • recognizing the frailty of all that is seen and increased faith in the reality of things that are unseen
  • experiencing the peace and joy that comes from God alone

And, of course, I have a unique opportunity to proclaim God’s power and provision.  Trials are not fun, but they are a necessary part of making us who God wants us to be.  Some say He only allows trials as a result of the fallen world we created by our own rebellion against God (through Adam and Eve).  But, there is evidence that God designs specific trials for specific people, promising to go through it all with us, for our good and His glory.  We are told to expect trials in this life and we are encouraged to know they serve a very useful purpose – Psalm 23:4, Romans 5:1-5Romans 8:18-252 Corinthians 1:3-5, 2 Corinthians 12:7-10, James 1:2-12, I Peter 4:12-13.

Some websites will tell you that Lyme is quickly taken care of by a round of antibiotics (one month to three months … I have a friend who was on antibiotics off and on for five years for her Lyme).  If you catch it immediately after the bite, it can be eradicated.  But, generally it is a life-long fight.  Most resources will tell you there is no known cure for Lyme disease, because the spirochetes like to hide deep within tissues, muscles, blood and bones, so it is impossible to know if “we got’em all.”   It is also usually a collection of several infections that are administered through that dreaded insect bite.   Some are more deadly than Lyme!  Lyme disease is called the great imitator because many diseases are falsely diagnosed – actually being Lyme, like: Fibromyalgia, MS, Rheumatoid Arthritis, Chronic Fatigue, ALS, etc.

My goal is to get as well as I can, so I can be as functional as possible.  God and I take one day at a time.  I hope people will understand that I may not be able to say yes to many extra opportunities for awhile.  I’ve cut back on my time online as it is quite draining.  Most days it is an accomplishment just to get the dishes washed and have food on the table.  We’ve added 2 DVD classes to help with our homeschooling.  I’ve learned how to make jewelry, which is both relaxing and something fun I can do without too much effort. We are pursuing having my eight amalgam fillings replaced as we believe this may be part off the process of getting rid of heavy metal poisoning so that my system can concentrate of getting rid of the Lyme.  I am very thankful for each day and the strength God provides!  I know God can heal me if He wants to, so I trust Him to do what is best for us.  My deepest desire is that God will be honored through this!

If you have Lyme or know someone with Lyme, I would love to hear your comments below.  What has God been teaching you through your journey?  What are your struggles? What treatments have you found to be helpful for you?  Because of Jesus we have a bright future!  God is faithful.  Thank You, God!

Joyfully His,

Sara

Psalm 73:26 – “My flesh and my heart fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion for ever.”

 * If you suspect you may have Lyme, the most reliable tests are done through IGeneX.

Helpful Resources

VIDEOS

1.  LymeLight – The Story of a professional freeskier, Angeli VanLannan, with Lyme
2.  About Lyme and why the government and most doctors avoid it.
3.  TV star battles Lyme
4.  Under Our Skin documentary
5.  Under our Skin, Emergence review (sequel, 2014)
6.  Hope for chronic Lyme
7.  Alternatives to antibiotics

ARTICLES

1.  Finding a Lyme literate doctor in your area
2.  Lyme is the “Great Imitator,” misdiagnosed as fibromyalgia, depression, M.S., Chronic Fatigue, ALS, Rheumatoid Arthritis, etc.
3.  Hope for chronic Lyme
4.  Lyme information
5.  Essential Oils Treatment: Raindrop Massage Technique

BOOKS

1.  Insights Into Lyme Disease Treatment: 13 Lyme Literate Health Care Practitioners Share Their Healing Strategies by Connie Strasheim
2.  Freedom From Lyme Disease: New Treatments for a Complete Recovery by Bryan Rosner
3.  Why Can’t I Get Better?  by Richard Horowitz, MD
4.  The Lyme Disease Solution by Kenneth B. Singleton, MD
5.  Healing Lyme: Natural Healing and Prevention of Lyme by Stephen Herrod Buhner
6.  The Lyme Diet: Nutritional Strategies for Healing From Lyme Disease by Nicola McFadzean, ND
7.  Recipes for Repair, A Lyme Disease Cookbook, by Kenneth B. Singleton, MD, MPH
8.  When Antibiotics Fail: Lyme Disease and Rife Machines, with Critical Evaluation of Leading Alternative Therapies by Bryan Rosner
9.  *** Saving the BEST for last, I highly recommend Quieting a Noisy Soul for anxiety and panic attacks.  Excellent material!  I can’t say enough good about it.

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How God Gave Me Victory Over 9-11

September 2008

The clock was ticking.  One joyous hour had passed since my youngest son’s birth.  The process had been simpler than last time, and I was gratefully munching on delicious food.  While a nurse checked on me, Tim surprised me by asking her, “What is that dripping sound?”  The nurse replied casually, “Oh, it’s probably just something in the bathroom.” Nope.  It was me.

Suddenly I felt like an actress in a dramatic movie:

  • In one corner, my extremely concerned husband was talking with a doctor
  • Our room was suddenly filled with people, my hospital bed surrounded by worried nurses
  • The anesthesiologist (whom I had expected never to see again) was poised, ready to prepare me for surgery

Someone got down close to me and explained that I may need to have an emergency hysterectomy.  I only remember saying, “I don’t want to die.”  Praying that I would live to continue to be Tim’s wife and Bugga and Booga’s mommy, they pushed me down the hallway toward surgery.  I was lifted onto a table.  Then it all went black.

I woke up gasping for breath and shaking uncontrollably.  Tim and our pastor were standing next to me.  As the symptoms lessened, I was relieved to learn I had only needed a  D&C (a surgical procedure to clear out stubborn placenta that was causing me to hemorrhage). My uterus was in tact, but, my blood count was terribly low – less than half of normal.

That evening, when my Dad asked about what I had been through, I was startled by my sharp reply:  “I don’t want to talk about it!”  My heart had been stretched further than it ever had been before.  All I could do was think about my too-close-for-comfort brush with death and thank God for getting me through.

Hoping that the worst was behind me, I looked forward to going home and starting our new life with two boys.  But, my blood count was simply too low.  Thus, a miserable blood transfusion followed two days later.  They couldn’t find a vein.  I could think of a million places I’d rather be at that moment.  God sent a gentle nurse to pray with me. “I don’t like needles!” I tearfully admitted my dread. She sympathetically held my hand and sadly whispered, “I don’t either.” They tried again and again … finally, mercifully, a willing tunnel accepted the gift of life, and soon we were on our way home.

For months I struggled with the fear of dying.  Sure, I knew that whenever it was my time to go, I would go to be with God.  But, this solid fact surprisingly didn’t prevent the panic attacks I was experiencing.  It didn’t help that my weakened state was the ideal resort for every germ within a hundred miles.  I was sick more than I was well, and I kept getting weaker.  I felt like a helpless, hopeless, useless woman.  A few sweet friends from church and my sister came to help us. They were such an encouragement!  Sadly, I hardly remember having the energy to enjoy my babies.
Curiously, as the title of this post suggests, my fear manifested itself primarily in an obsession about September 11, 2001.  Every day I would have day-mares, reliving the horrors I had seen on television and heard on the radio.  It felt like I was chained in front of a video stuck on replay.  This wasn’t something on my to-do list: Think morbid thoughts.  
 
Truth be told, I was stuck and didn’t know how to get out.  To exacerbate my rut even further, it seemed like every time I looked at a clock it said 9:11.  Even though I prayed, went to church, and read my Bible, I felt like I was losing touch with reality.

A medical doctor referred me to a local Christian counselor.  She was a good listener, kind, and pointed me to God’s sovereignty.  Practically she suggested that whenever my thoughts started capsizing, I should immediately stop whatever I’m doing and walk into another room, completely changing my activity.  This diversion helped, but I needed something more powerful.  I desperately sought the strength of my Counselor. 

“For unto us a Child is born, unto us a Son is given; and the government will be upon His shoulder. And His name will be called Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God,  Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.”
Isaiah 9:6

I cried out to God and asked Him to pull me out of this pit of death.  I thought often of Psalm 40 and waited for Him to pull me out of the miry clay and set my feet on a rock and establish my goings.  I sensed that God wanted me to be specific in my prayers, so I asked Him to turn my head clock-ward at eleven minutes after anything except nine: 2:11, 5:11, 7:11.  And I promised Him that every time I would see an “11” I would say, out loud, “God is faithful! Thank You, God!” 

Almost immediately, I kid you not, from that time forward nearly every time I looked at a clock I was rewarded with seeing 2:11, 5:11, 7:11, 12:11, and so forth.  For years I had known God’s power through His word and His work in my life.  But with this recent gift, I knew the power of God in a very personal way, and I could see the tender warmth of the Son burning off the fog of fear.  My toxic thoughts changed to praise and I poured out, “God is faithful! Thank You, God!”  It was particularly delightful when He would cause me to look up and see 11:11 – double duty praise and thankfulness!! 

After about a year, my health improved and I regained strength.  God had never left my side, and He became dearer than ever before.


With Joshua (2 weeks old) at Pikes Peak State Park

Why do I share this with you?  It is so tiny compared to what others have suffered due to the events of 9-11.  I do not pretend to compare my situation with others.  Nevertheless, I too, in a small way, suffered part of the consequences of sin and death in this world.  It was a dark time in my life.  God let me stay there, I believe, long enough to always remember what it felt like.  Then, when His timing was right, God pierced through my shadows with His marvelous light.

“The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid? When the wicked came against me to eat up my flesh, my enemies and foes, they stumbled and fell. Though an army may encamp against me, my heart shall not fear; though war may rise against me, in this I will be confident. One thing I have desired of the Lord, that will I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord, and to inquire in His temple. For in the time of trouble He shall hide me in His pavilion; in the secret place of His tabernacle He shall hide me; He shall set me high upon a rock.” 

Psalm 27:1-5

Whatever it is – from your past or in your present, it isn’t too big for God.  He can work in seemingly small ways to remind us of His huge faithfulness. Have you asked Him to show you His light?

If you have time, here is an amazing account of a Bible recovered after 9-11-01. 
 

 
Joyfully His,
Sara

P.S.  This morning (9-11-14) I looked to see what time it was, and the clock read 11:11 – “God is still faithful, thank You, God … God is still faithful, thank You God.”

Shovels, Love, and Hot Cocoa

“There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.”
I John 4:18 NKJV

Yesterday I watched my sons, ages 5 and 7, shovel the snow.  They were so excited to get out there, shovel in hand, helping and making the way clear.  As I stood and watched them, I was filled with love and thankfulness for my little men, growing up so big and strong, physically and spiritually. 

They weren’t perfect in their shoveling.  But, they would try to improve their methods if a lift or push didn’t do what they wanted it to do.  Of course the bigger boy got more done, but the younger did his best.  I love them the same and didn’t compare them.

It was a moment of love, not fear.  And it made me think of God’s love for us.  He looks at us in love.  He is not wagging His finger in disgust, micromanaging our lives.  He allows us to make mistakes.  He forgives.  He doesn’t compare us with each other.  He gives us the “thumbs up” as we walk along the path of life with Him.

When the boys saw me watching, smiling from the window (between stretches, lunges, and squats – gotta get exercise in sometime!), they worked harder, happier, and pretty much “went to town,” clearing the entire driveway, sidewalk, and steps.

Knowing that God is watching me with love removes my fear.  He is with me.  He is cheering me on.  He is providing everything I need to accomplish His will.  He appreciates it when I do the laundry and dishes for His glory.  And He has a reward waiting for me …

Aches, pains, cold.  After putting in several minutes of hard work, my boys came into our warm home, happy to find hot cocoa and a loving, thankful Mama.  Someday, I am going to go home, too.  And I want to hear my Father say, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”  Maybe He will even have hot cocoa for us to share together.

In Her Shoes – Women and Cancer

 

“But He knows the way that I take; when He has tested me,
I shall come forth as gold.” Job 23:10 NKJV

 

This month we are blessed to hear from three women who have walked with God through the valley of the shadow of cancer.  Each testimony will bless your heart and remind you of God’s ever faithful love.  Below is a list of resources.  If you would like to share about your cancer journey or the journey of someone you love, we would treasure hearing from you at the end of this article. 

Our first testimony is from my sweet sister in Christ, Sarah from Iowa, who was diagnosed with a brain tumor and the very real possibility of cancer.  She delights in sharing about God’s faithfulness through her time of trial.  Thank you, Sarah!

God Is My Refuge 

 

Somewhere around the middle of 2012 was when I first began to realize that something might be wrong.  There were no major symptoms, but just a series of incidents that were significant enough to begin to cause some concern, such as some memory loss, a couple of severe headaches, and a dizzy spell or two that all seemed unusual.

 

From the very beginning, God’s hand was amazingly evident in every detail!  First of all, our family has a friend who is a neurologist, and she was the one who, after hearing about the incidents I had, was able to get me a referral to see a doctor in early October.  He did an EEG and an MRI, which revealed a small mass in my right temporal lobe that was causing some minor seizure-like activity in my brain.  He was of the opinion that it needed to be removed, even though it appeared benign, and he referred me to a doctor at the University of Iowa Hospital, because of the world-class excellence of the neurosurgery department there.  I first saw him on October 22, and he was able to get me scheduled me for surgery on November 14.

God graciously allowed me to continue teaching right up until the day before my surgery and make preparations for my aid, who took over the classroom in my absence.  This dear woman was another clear evidence of God’s sovereign provision, since she had been a part of our classroom since the beginning of the year and works wonderfully well with the kids!

The surgery lasted 7 hours and went very well, however they had to leave a small part of the tumor, because it was located so near to the brain stem.  We had been told that very likely I would have to do further treatment at some point or possibly have another surgery in the future.  I was released from the hospital 4 days after surgery and permitted to go to stay with my parents during the recovery time.  God’s timing was so perfect, as the time recommended for recovery took me right up to Christmas break, and it was such a blessing to be able to be with my family during that time!

When the pathology report came back, I was told that it was the best possible news I could have received!  Not only was the tumor benign, but amazingly they do not believe that I will ever have to worry about it again, even though they couldn’t remove it entirely!  I was totally overwhelmed by God’s goodness and mercy in giving me such complete healing!  The prayers of so many people on my behalf during this time were truly humbling and encouraging, and it was wonderful to be able to share this news, for when many people pray, many thanks can be rendered to God for His answer!

As I daily recovered my strength, it was great to be able to resume more and more normal activities, and when school started back up in January, I was able to go back to teaching.  It really only took about a week before I really felt like I was back into the swing of things, and in fact, in many ways I felt even better than I had before the surgery!

God has continued to give me many opportunities to share what He did through all of this, and to Him be all the glory for everything, for He is truly sovereign in every detail of life and wonderfully good in everything that He allows!  I would not trade this experience, because I learned so much through it – especially about what the Body of Christ looks like when it is truly functioning as God intends it to, the nearness of God that we can most fully experience when we are hurting the most or feeling the most needy, and His absolute sovereignty in every detail of our lives!  I praise Him for entrusting me with this small trial, so that I can be better able to be an encouragement to others with the same comfort that God gave to me during this time!

One of the verses that became especially precious to me through all this is Psalm 59:16 –

“I will sing of Your strength and will
joyfully proclaim Your faithful love in the morning.  For You have been a
stronghold for me, a refuge in my day of trouble.”  CSB

Truly, God is my strength, my joy, and my refuge, and life’s trials only serve to make that truth more real and more precious than ever!

 This next testimony is from the heart of a beautiful friend named Kay who lives in Alabama.  I learned so much and was extremely encouraged by what she shared, and I know you will be, too.  Thank you, Kay!

 

My Cancer Journey . . .

– When your Mom gets breast cancer and you’re in elementary school, and when she passes away from it when you’re 12, you always have in the back of your mind that you’re going to get breast cancer, too.

– So when you find your first lump at 16, have it removed and it comes back benign, you’re relieved.

– And when you start having mammograms at 30, and they routinely show lumps that are non-cancerous you are relieved.

– And when you have a lump that doesn’t change, but doesn’t go away, you don’t really worry, but you get it checked out.  But, when the hospital Breast Cancer Center calls you back, and you walk in and see the doctor and the head of the BC Support Group, and before they even open their mouths, you know “this is the moment you’ve been dreading for 36 years!,” you’re still shocked, surprised, and numb.

At that point I was thankful for 3 specific things in my life: an amazing husband, a wonderful care team, and God’s immeasurable grace.
The medical care team told me they believed we had caught it early, but that we would need to do some more testing.  At that point things flew very quickly.  I was glad I’d thought through what I’d do, because you have to make life-altering, and body-altering decisions rather rapidly.

I chose a completely traditional medicine approach at that time.  If I had it to do again, I would probably do it differently – but I trust that God had me where he wanted me when He wanted me, so I choose to have no regrets. The doctors thought lumpectomy might be enough. With my history (which also included positive aunts on my father’s side), I chose double mastectomy.

Following surgery, the doctors told me they were glad for my decision; they found tumors in both breasts that had not appeared in any diagnostic procedure. Mastectomy was the only logical choice, and it had been the choice God had led me to make.

I cannot describe God’s overwhelming presence throughout the entire journey. Frankly, sometimes I almost miss cancer because I miss that extra grace that God gives in trials like that.  And, when you know your life is in God’s hands, you can trust that He is in control and going to do with it was it best for you and best for bringing glory to His name. Period.

I had many extra opportunities to talk with others about the Lord during this time. Many could not understand peace in the midst of my storm. On the other side, many were a great encouragement to me during this time.  I started a Facebook Page (link here) just to keep everyone updated. It was a HUGE comfort to ask for prayer and KNOW that friends were truly praying for me.  It was also very cathartic to be able to write out what I was going through each step of the way.  I’m also encouraged to go back and read through God’s provision and presence at every single step.

What did people say “right?”  “I’m praying for you” and “I love you” were always the best!  I loved the specific people – “we pray for you every day at breakfast!” or “the kids and I pray for you each night at bedtime.”  It reminded me that, if I was feeling bad at 8:00, the family that put their kids to bed at 8:00 was praying for me! Also the tangible “what can I do?” was wonderful.  It was offered often, but the ones who really waited and listened for me to answer were special. Also those who gave me permission to have bad days and a shoulder to cry on, even if words were never spoken were a blessing.

What did people say “wrong?” “OH, that’s terrible! My Grandma died from that!” or “Have fun in the bedroom now, you won’t be attractive to your hubby after they cut your breasts off!”  “Oh, you must be so terrified for your daughters!” (That one WAS one of my greatest fears, and I had to address it with the Lord. But someone reminding me really didn’t help anything!) Yeah, those three were pretty bad! Most of the time, people were great! Sometimes people put their foot in their mouth – but we usually just laughed together after that. I appreciated the effort and the selflessness of trying to say something sweet, even if it came out wrong.

If you found out you had cancer today, I’d encourage you to pause. And then pray. I was grateful for quick care. But, frankly, there really was no rush. We’d been watching things for over 6 months; we could have waited 6 more months and little would have changed.  Pray and ask God to guide you (and spouse, if you are fortunate enough to have one involved). Then seek the counsel of those who have walked the path already. I learned more from other “survivors” than I did from Google, WebMD, medical journals, and the American Cancer Society together! Then pray some more and ask God to direct your specific path. Talk with your pastor and pastor’s wife.  They probably have a great deal more experience with “big things” than you do – even if it’s not cancer. Then walk your path with peace and confidence.

Our purpose on this planet is to glorify God. Psalm 86:12 tells us:

“I will praise thee, O Lord my God, with all my heart: and I will glorify thy name for evermore.” KJV

I also found comfort in Philippians 1:20:

“According to my earnest expectation and my hope, that in nothing I shall be ashamed, but that with all boldness, as always, so now also Christ shall be magnified in my body, whether it be by life, or by death.” KJV

 

Frankly, if God wanted me to die from cancer, everything would be better because of it. He had a plan, and I was blessed to be a part of that plan.

 

I’m thankful I’m still here. But I remind myself, am I glorifying God today as much as I was when I was walking the path of breast cancer?  Cancer, in its own way, was something God allowed in my life that drew me closer to Him – and for that I am thankful.

 

This last testimony is from the mom of a dear college friend.  Thank you, Donna in California!  You are a blessing.

 

GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME

It was about the beginning of December that I noticed something wasn’t quite right.  I made an appointment, and a verse started going through my mind – we had the sentence of death in ourselves.   The nurse practitioner found a large mass and seemed alarmed.  She told me to schedule a mammogram and ultrasound.  Thenext day the verse went through my mind again and I was by myself: “Lord, are you trying to telling me I am going to die?”

I stopped what I was doing and looked up the verse: II Corinthians 1:8-11:

“For we would not, brethren, have you ignorant of our trouble
which came to us in Asia, that we were pressed out of measure, above strength,
insomuch that we despaired even of life (sounds like cancer surgery, chemotherapy, being sick as a dog, and finding out you
have Stage IV cancer
):  But we had the sentence of death in ourselves, that we should not trust in ourselves, but
in God which raiseth the dead: Who delivered us from so great a death, and doth
deliver: in whom we trust that he will yet deliver us: Ye also helping together
by prayer for us, that for the gift bestowed upon us by the means of many
persons, thanks may be given by many on our behalf.” KJV

 

I want to just make a plea here for you to familiarize yourself with God’s word.  It is so easy to do that in this day and age, with all the technology available to us.  You can listen to scripture on your iPod or iPad, download it, put it on CD’s, hear it in your car or when you are getting ready in the morning, you can get preaching from Sunday (online) – there are so many ways to get the Bible in to renew your mind – what a harvest of blessings that will bring to you!

You know, God really is good all the time.  He knows I am prone to worry.  He knew I might just fall apart if I got news of cancer.  So, He gave me these verses ahead of time, so I wouldn’t go off the deep end and despair.  I haven’t been upset about having cancer.  Other people are more upset than I am.  God was good to prepare me.

I had the mammogram and ultrasound, and the doctor said he saw something and scheduled a biopsy.  Three days before my biopsy, I was asked to play the offertory for Sunday. I chose Be Still My Soul. The phrase kept jumping out at me – in every change, He faithful will remain. God will be faithful to me in every change.

On January 22nd

I found out it was breast cancer and the doctor who gave me the news was so sweet.  I really was doing fine until she started being sympathetic and told me to put my trust in God.  That made me cry, and she cried with me. My Bible reading for that day was Exodus 14-16: 14:13 says, “Fear ye not, stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord, which he will show to you today.” God told me in His word that morning, before I went to the appointment,
not to be afraid.

The oncologist said, “This is a sneaky kind of cancer.”  It’s not a lump – I never felt a lump – it’s a thickening, so it’s harder to detect.  And it’s lobular, so it doesn’t show up on a mammogram until it is very large.  She told us what our options were and one of them was the mastectomy and reconstruction.

Obviously, what I think is best for me would be no cancer.  But God had something else in mind.  If you had asked me 5 months ago if I thought it would be good for me to have cancer I would have said, “Of course not!”  But if it is true that God only does what is best for me, then it is good for me to have cancer.

We’ve been praying for some loved ones, to be saved, for some time now – and we don’t really know if they are unsaved or just away from the Lord.  One of them responded positively to an email update.  If I had to get cancer in order for him to get right with the Lord, it’s totally worth it. If I have to endure some light affliction in order for his immortal soul to be in heaven one day – that’s such a small price to pay.  I’ve always wished I could be able to reach some of my coworkers for the Lord, and this cancer has really opened doors for me. I want them to see that God is good, all the time … even when you get cancer.

My pastor came over that day and prayed with us and said he agrees with me about my verses and feels the Lord is going to use this cancer for ministry to others.  He gave me Philippians 1:29:

 For unto you it is given (it’s a gift) in the behalf of
Christ, not only to believe on him, but also to suffer for his sake.”  KJV

 

Suffering is a gift from God.  He said there are 3 reasons people suffer – for stupidity, for sin, and for service.  And part of the reason may be stupidity – I hadn’t had a mammogram for 8 years, so we might have caught it sooner, but maybe not since it’s so hard to detect.  My doctor did say I have had this cancer for years.  (I just want to put in a little plug here.  If you do need to get a mammogram, you are better off to get the thermal kind, so you are not getting all that radiation.)

He said God is not doing this to me, He is doing this for me.  Then he gave us Psalm 71:18. I love this one:

“Now also when I am old and grey-headed, O God, forsake me not;
until I have showed thy strength unto this generation and thy power to every
one that is to come.” KJV

God will use this to show His power to my children and my grandchildren.  I was actually kind of excited about having cancer.  I do want my children and grandchildren to love God and cling closely to Him all their days.

I thought I was handling everything pretty well, but even if our minds are doing well, our bodies can be reacting to the stress. That night I had flashing lights on the side of my vision that last for several minutes.  Before my appointment (to check my eyes), I went to a nutrition class for cancer patients, and saw a man with a scar from one ear to the other, over the top of his head, and his hair was just starting to grow back.  I thought, Oh my word, he must have brain cancer!

After class I told my nurse about the flashing lights and I said, “You don’t think that could have anything to do with my breast cancer, do you?”  She said, “Well, breast cancer goes to the brain, so your doctor will probably order a brain scan, in fact she’ll probably order a full body scan, just to make sure.”

I went to the car and cried.  I don’t mind having breast cancer, but I don’t want to have brain cancer. I found out it was an eye migraine caused by stress.  The Lord has given me grace for breast cancer because I have breast cancer … and that’s why I’m okay with it.  But He has not given me grace for brain cancer, because I don’t have brain cancer.

Some of you may think, “I could never handle what she’s going through!”  Yes, you could.  If God gives that to you, He will also give you the grace to bear it.  Grace is spiritual strength.  It is that ability to be obedient to our Savior, even under pressure.  It’s what keeps us from falling under the load.  You will have the spiritual strength to endure whatever the Lord brings into your life because He’s a good God.

The end of that week I had a biopsy of the lymph node that was positive for cancer, and later had a bone scan that showed cancer all down my spine and in my pelvis.  So, I am Stage IV.  Once breast cancer has metastasized to other parts of the body, there is no cure. They still felt I needed surgery, so I went ahead and had a 9 hour surgery at UCLA that included the mastectomy, removal of 60 lymph nodes (59 of which were cancerous) and the reconstruction.  Just before surgery I was tempted to be frightened.  But, I had taken a verse with me to the hospital (Colossians 3:15 – “And let the peace of God rule in your hearts … and be ye thankful”). That verse calmed me right down, and I started thinking of all my blessings. I remembered all the cards, emails, kind words and prayers going up for me.  There are some perks to having cancer – you find out how much everyone loves you.  I was thankful for my husband and all my wonderful family.  I felt very loved and cared for.

Right now I am doing very well.  I don’t have any symptoms, I don’t have any pain.  The Lord has been so good to me.  I haven’t had to endure what most cancer patients go through.  I didn’t have to have chemotherapy and be sick or lose my hair.  My treatment is a pill I take every day and then I get a shot once a month.  I have a couple more out-patient surgeries for reconstruction. I do have Stage IV cancer, but my doctor said I could live for years on this treatment.

I hope all this has helped you realize how good God is and that you can trust Him with anything, even that hard thing that makes you tremble.

 

Resources

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How Not to Thrill Satan

“Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth!”
Psalm 46:10


I love storms.  I love the booms of thunder, reminiscent of Independence Day fireworks, that shake my house and the lightning flash that always takes me by surprise.  Not so much when I was a child.  But, somewhere along the line I became captivated by God’s power. My boys are also calmed during a storm when I say, “Listen to how powerful God is!”  They are still a little afraid, but they are also impressed. 

This morning during Bible study, I have the rare delight of sitting by my bedroom window as a storm comes in.  The weather radar on the website tells me soon it will be on top of us.

I’ve been working my way through Hebrews, and this morning I came to the last half of Hebrews 12.  Good stuff!  Will you join me for a few moments in His Word? You can grab your own Bible or read it with me here:

Hebrews 12:18-29

Mountain Tour

Let’s go back.  We find ourselves back at the foot of Sinai.  I AM presents Himself to Israel. And all around us we hear Israelites, scared out of their wits, crying and begging for the trumpet sound and His words to stop.  Terror of His might is only surpassed by their terror of His commandments.  Even brave Moses was “exceedingly afraid and trembling” (21).  Behold the power of I AM!

Let’s go forward.  In verse 22 we zoom to another mountain – Mount Zion.  We are situated in the realms of a new covenant, made possible because I AM came further down than the top of a mountain, to live among us.  We read here about how the “God the judge of all” (23) provides “Jesus the Mediator” (24).

“SEE THAT YOU DO NOT REFUSE HIM WHO SPEAKS.” (25)

From the halls of heaven to Mount Sinai, to Mount Zion, to our very hearts.  He is still speaking … are we really listening?

“Beware, brethren, lest there be in any of you an evil heart of unbelief in departing from the living God;  but exhort one another daily, while it is called ‘Today,’ lest any of you be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin.  For we have become partakers of Christ if we hold the beginning of our confidence steadfast to the end, while it is said: ‘Today, if you will hear His voice, do not harden your hearts as in the rebellion.’”
Hebrews 3:12-15

Satan and Self Don’t Want Me to Listen

I crave solitude.  But I don’t always like quiet.  Whenever I am presented with the rare gift of being at home alone, the first few moments I bask in the silence.  But, soon I turn on music or find myself humming as I work.  I’ve even been known to turn on the radio or TV just for “background” noise.  I like to watch Netflix while I’m working on my menu plan, play the piano, listen to the radio in the van, talk to my Mom or a friend on the phone.

Satan would be thrilled if we are too busy – to ever listen to God.

Jesus died and rose again to have a relationship with us.  How would we like a friend who always talks but never listens?  I love to read my Bible, talk to God as soon as I wake up, talk to Him in the evening before bed, and those sweet moments alone with Him in the dead of night.  But, I rarely take time to truly listen to God.

Why?  Partly time constraints, and the reality of homeschooling two noisy boys.  But, also I think I have to admit, I am afraid of what He is going to tell me.  I’d rather listen to those who say what I want to hear.  What feels good and fits my agenda.  What sin is He going to uncover in my heart?  What is He going to ask me to do?  If I am willing, perfect Love, God Himself, will cast out every fear … replacing it with Himself.

“For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God.”
Romans 8:14

Make An Appointment with God

It’s time to make an appointment.  Otherwise, it may never come to pass.  Get out your day timer or gaze up at your family wall calendar in the kitchen.  Let’s schedule some time, 15-30 minutes, either this weekend or next week just to listen to I AM.  Begin your time by reading His Word and asking Him to speak to you.  Like Samuel, “Speak Lord, for your servant hears!” Then, let’s try to get into a habit of spending time every week, even 5-10 minutes daily, just to listen to Him.  We will be changed by His presence and His power.

The soothing rain and booming thunder draw me in, grabbing my attention and feeding my senses as I sit here talking with you.  Let’s let God’s powerful Self draw us in!  God, in His graciousness, makes Himself accessible to us.  While basking in the riches of His grace, let’s not forget Who He is … and that He wants our attention, our reverence, and our obedience.

“My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me.”
Hebrews 10:27

Sparkles of Joy

Two and a half years ago:

It’s a cloudy Saturday.  The dishes and laundry scream “clean me!”  My to-do list is so long it could be used as ribbon to bedeck several beautifully wrapped packages.  I try to remember why I ever wanted to have children (who make messes, yucky smells, and lots of noise), the imperfect carpet and linoleum grind at me, I can’t remember what the word vacation means, my husband and I are in a rut in our relationship, my jeans are too tight, and I am too busy to make a dentist appointment much less squeeze in a coveted hair cut. 

Then it happened. “MOM!!!”  Four-year-old screaming bloody murder.  My husband and I run into the other room to find our son’s forearm hanging gruesomely crooked as terror fills his beautiful blue eyes.  I try to keep from throwing up, reminding myself to breathe as I wonder what to do next.  Between sobs he tells us he jumped off the couch and hit a desk chair (which he knows is a no-no).  Tim gathers a few things as I throw together a sack of hopefully edible items to send with my two men.  Baby and I remain at home, and I ask God to keep my son and our family safe.

They are off to the hospital, and I dissolve in a tirade of tears.  I call my pastor.  He remembers. Same song, different verse.  Two and a half years earlier, when my adorable boysie was learning to walk, he fractured his leg.  It was minor, but because we weren’t sure how it happened (we figured out when it must have happened after the intimidating doctor visit), our doctor informed us that she had to submit our name to the Department of Child Services to be investigated for child endangerment.  I struggled with shock and anger while our betraying doctor assured me, “I know you would never do anything to hurt your child.”  We went through the worst trial we had ever experienced, only to be waved through at the end of a grueling month as “probably not dangerous.”  Violated. Hurt. Labeled. (Reminds me of Someone I know.)  I heard my pastor at the other end of the line saying, “Sara, you need to trust God.”

I calm down as I cry out to God.  While fearing the worst, I know my God . . . I can trust the Creator of the universe.  A couple hours later they come home.  My boy’s arm is safe and secure in a new shell.  Tim looks tired, but he says it went pretty smoothly.  He didn’t feel that anyone doubted what happened.  It helps when the child is old enough to explain this time.  I start to breathe again.

Suddenly, even though I am completely drained, I look around and notice that my home is not hum-drum anymore.  I am so thankful to be here. The linoleum is looking shinier, and the carpet spots are hardly noticeable.  My husband and I kiss and hold each other a little longer.  After a nap I have an urge to clean my family’s clothes and cook them a delicious meal. I don’t mind having toys all over the floor, and wall smudges have become my art gallery. As I glance in the bathroom mirror, I think perhaps I am looking prettier than I have in days.  And at supper the whole family seems happy simply being together.  In coming weeks my heart warms at the sight of my boy with his orange cast and matching Tigger overalls.  I can’t help but giggle, while in the same breath praising and thanking God.  God got us through and did what He does best – turning ugly things into His beautiful artwork. He used a terrible day to sprinkle sparkles of joy on my heart.

What happened?  Did a broken arm suddenly and miraculously change everything?  No . . . the carpet was still blotched, the laundry piled high, and my hair seriously in need of reshaping . . . and, yes . . .  God adjusted my heart and healed my blindness.  If only it wouldn’t take hospital trips to make me truly appreciate God’s blessings.  By God’s grace, I’m getting there. 

God’s joy is always there for the taking.  In fact, it has your name and mine written on it by God’s hand with the most expensive and the most powerful permanent ink imaginable: Jesus’ precious blood.

This Christmas will you join me in taking time to open up, admire, put on, and gratefully enjoy His gift of joy?  Let’s close our eyes, take a couple of deep breaths, and accept this lavish gift.  With thankfulness we receive Your gift of joy, Father.  We know this gift is ours because of Jesus.  For He has come . . . and will come again. 

“Then the angel said to them, ‘Do not be afraid, for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy which will be to all people. For there is born to you this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.  And this will be the sign to you: You will find a Babe wrapped in swaddling cloths, lying in a manger.’ And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying: ‘Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, goodwill toward men!”
Luke 2:10-14 
 
Update: Today my oldest son is a happy and healthy almost seven-year-old.  And I am getting more used to dusting off my priceless gift of joy.

Special thanks to http://poppiesatplay.blogspot.com/2011/11/joy-to-world.html for the above image.

Ten "Going Crazy" Tips

“Call the Funny Farm!”  Not if, but when is the last time you were in a position of confusion, exhaustion, discouragement and/or grief, and you felt someone must quickly provide emergency intervention?  If you’re like me, it was as recent as yesterday or this morning. Stressful moments, from mildly irritating to incredibly difficult, come to all of us!  They can sneak up as a complete surprise.  They can also be predictable.  Can you relate to some of these?

  • Full schedule
  • Homeschooling (especially on wet or cold days after we’ve been inside for too long!)
  • Times of transition
  • Weddings
  • Holidays
  • Illness or injury
  • Hormones
  • New member in the family
  • A time of loss
  • Financial strain
  • Job tension
  • When disappointed by people or circumstances
  • When we sin against or disappoint people 
  • When we receive bad news
  • Reorganization at work or church
  • During a move/remodel
  • Etc!

How do you deal with your craziness? It really is a good thing that our lives aren’t completely trouble free.  If they were, where would our need be for God?  You’ve probably heard these before, but I’m praying that God will use something here to encourage you, dear Sister!  Here are a few of my favorite “Crazy” tips:

1.  Rest

As soon as possible do whatever it takes to get much needed rest.  My two boys, six and four, are pretty much beyond naps.  Yet, we still have a 1 1/2 hour reading/quiet time in the middle of the day.  It is helpful for everyone.  My six-year-old actually looks forward to it!  If you are anything like me, everything seems much worse when I am overly tired.  And my exhaustion can be a sign that my priorities are out of kilter.  My doing too much can be attibuted to my own pride. 

Whenever necessary (not more than once per day :)), get your kids occupied with a good video and go to your room, close the door, put on your MP3 player or a good set of earplugs, lay flat on the floor and stretch your arms above your head while breathing in and out slowly.  Here is one of my helpers:

“It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows; for so He gives His beloved sleep.” Psalm 127:2


2.  Eat

It really can be as simple as taking time to nourish ourselves.  My tendency is to crave chocolate and potato chips, but these usually make me feel worse.  At the risk of sounding like your mother, eat well and drink lots of water.  Grill some chicken, make a salad, grab an apple.  Go through a drive-thru and buy a salad if you can afford it.  Indulge in the food you are craving, if you must.  But, don’t go overboard, and don’t resort to splurging as a daily escape from reality.  Popcorn is a calming snack, as is a banana.  I love it that when Elijah was tired, afraid, and discouraged God did not berate him and condemn him.  God isn’t condemning us: let us not condemn ourselves.  Enjoy some of God’s good gifts – eat!

“Then the word of the Lord came to him, saying, ‘Get away from here and turn eastward, and hide by the Brook Cherith, which flows into the Jordan.  And it will be that you shall drink from the brook, and I have commanded the ravens to feed you there.’” I Kings 17:2-4


3.  Remember you are in a spiritual battle.

Too easily I forget that I am a soldier in a spiritual war.  I’m sure that my forgetfulness, and the ensuing consequences, makes Satan very happy.  We should expect daily battles!  You think your temptations regarding food isn’t part of your spiritual battle?  What was Eve’s first spiritual battle about?  Yet, what we are really fighting against is far more gigantic than people, circumstances or food:

For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age” Ephesians 6:12


Would we go to the hottest site in Afghanistan unarmed?  No way.  Give me the largest tank and a wide selection of the most accute bombs available.  So then, how can we expect to face spiritual battles unarmed?  There is no option here.  We must eat, we must breath, we must be in God’s Word!  Especially during days of pressure, weakness, doubt, and possible depression, begin the day by putting on the armor of God, by reading and praying through Ephesians 6:10-20 (you can read it by clicking on the link below):


And, remember, we are on the winning side.

“You are of God, little children, and have overcome them, because He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.” I John 4:4

We must take time to read God’s love letter to us and . . .

4.  Pray

We cannot begin to estimate the power of talking to God.  Pour out your heart to Him!  If writing is your thing, grab a pen and paper or a computer and write your prayers to God.  It will help you to get it out of your system and leave it with the One Who has the power to work 24/7 for your good and His glory.  If you write it down it will also help you gain perspective on your problems.  How precious that our almighty God took on flesh and came to this wicked world.  He cried our tears, sharing our sorrows:

“We do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” Hebrews 4:15,16


5.  Talk to a godly friend. Ask for help! 

One of the highlights of Sunday is talking briefly with a friend at church about how we can pray for one another throughout the coming week.  And I can’t remember the number of times I have sent emergency emails or Facebook messages to ask sisters to pray for me.  It is an immediate relief to be reminded that we are not alone.  Don’t worry that you will be bothering someone (unless this is the 5th time you’ve called them today!). 

I do want to stress GODLY friend.  Not perfect (there aint any!), but growing.  Who is a godly friend?  One who is going to love you, show you grace, not judge you . . . but, also someone who is going to tell you the truth and not just what you want to hear.  Call the friend who listens, cares, and points you to Jesus.

We recently heard Todd Wilson, of FamilyMan Ministries, speak to our local homeschool parents group.  He spoke of a woman who called his wife and asked if she could come over to talk to her.  They started with small talk, but soon the conversation got deeper.  The visiting woman, one of whom Todd said we would all look at as the ultimate godly woman, quoting Scripture and giving glory to God, shared a personal hurt with Todd’s wife.  She told of a time two years before when she had been studying her Bible and her little girl kept interrupting and trying to get Mama’s attention.  The woman grabbed her little girls wrist too hard and broke it.  Since then the mother had been in agony.  As she shared her burden with this godly friend, she was able to breath and move on.  Todd’s wife didn’t condemn her, but instead told her things like, “Oh, I am so sorry!  Any one of us could’ve done the same thing!  I know you didn’t mean to do it.” (Todd even humorously admitted wanting to share some personal experience/not-so-good advice, “I understand . . . I’ve often felt like I wanted to break every bone in my child’s body!”)  Finally, this Christian sister was able to move on with her life.  Sometimes we just need to confess our mistakes or sins to a godly friend.

“Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.” James 5:16

6.  Forget the past and move on. 

If your stress has to do with your past (twenty years ago or yesterday), God wants you to forget it and move one.  If you need to apologize, write the letter, make the visit, or pick up the phone.  Even if people are hesitant to forgive.  God is always ready to forgive us!

If you have been sinned against and are constantly plagued by bad memories, practice giving these burdens to God – the more you do it the easier it will get to give them over to Him and not grab them back.  If you are obsessing, ask God to change your mind and literally get up and move into a different room and do a different activity.  A Christian counselor recommended this when I was obsessing about death after a close call, and it really helped me.  It is so refreshing when we can look forward to the future, entrusting our past and our future to God’s excellent care!

“Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 3:13-14


7.  Plan something to look forward to. 

We women have the privilege of serving the people in our lives: cooking, cleaning, driving people to appointments, cards, listening, etc.  But we get worn out and need to be recharged.  Get out your calendar and look for the first free space – plan a date with your husband or a friend.  If other people are too busy, plan a date for yourself – go out and get a coffee or ice cream, read a favorite book, sit by a beautiful lake and soak in God’s beauty.  And do it without feeling guilty!  God gives good gifts to His children!  He gave Jesus so that we can live more abundantly.

“And He said to them, “Come aside by yourselves to a deserted place and rest a while.” For there were many coming and going, and they did not even have time to eat.  So they departed to a deserted place in the boat by themselves.” Mark 6:31-32


8.  Claim your blessings. 

Reminiscent of Ann Voskamp’s wonderful book One Thousand Gifts, simply sit down and start writing down all the things you have to be thankful for.  Your list of “bad things” is much smaller than the “good things” . . . and you’ve probably realized why I set apart “good” and “bad” to remind us that our point of view is terribly limited.  What may seem bad to us may be what God is going to use to do amazingly good things in our lives.

Ask God to help you be thankful for where you are right now, including all the yucky stuff.  He can and will give strength to help us be genuinely thankful for trials. All we need to do is ask and wait on Him.  God highly treasures our sacrifice of praise.

“Therefore by Him let us continually offer the sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of our lips, giving thanks to His name.” Hebrews 13:15

9.  Cry and Breathe

Just a couple days ago I let it all out in my room, boo-hooing and doing some much needed grieving.  I felt so much better afterward. Crying purges!  It rids our bodies of toxins. Crying is part of what God has given to help us release some of the pent-up emotional pressure.  These verses are probably familiar to you, so I want to share them in a translation other than the NKJV to give another perspective.

“You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” Psalm 56:8 (NLT)


If you are not a cryer, take a brisk walk, work out, release that stress somehow (and I don’t mean hurling a pan over your husband’s head!).  And as our sweet more mature friends gently remind us, “This too shall pass.” 

“Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning.” Psalm 30:5

10.  Pick One

Think of five people you know who are going through a trial right now (not including yourself).  Plan how you, or you along with your family, can do something simple and special for him or her. 

If you have a neighbor who just broke her arm, offer to rake her leaves.  If you have a friend who just went through surgery, take a meal or a happy balloon over with a favorite coffee.  Fresh flowers can be an extravagant gift making people feel loved, but most women I know prefer plants that aren’t going to die (unless they have thumbs not even close to the color of green and are thankful that after a short while their flowers die naturally 🙂 ).

I have a friend who has been suffering with depression. Just a phone call meant the world to him and helped him to be brave enough to seek the help he needed.  I praise God that He used little ol’ me to help a brother in need, and at the same time get my mind off my own troubles.

“Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all, especially to those who are of the household of faith.” Galatians 6:10

I hope something in this list will help you during this crazy time of life!  The best thing to remember as women on God’s mission, we are not alone, and God is lovingly continuing the good work He started in us.

“Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For He Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”  Hebrews 13:5
“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God.  I will strengthen you, yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.'” Isaiah 41:10
“Being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ;”  Philippians 1:6